I just found this video and it's sort of changed my mind about him. Maybe he's just shy. Maybe he's not a D-hole. Perhaps he was legitimately afraid of me. Sometimes people are afraid of me. One time I just started screaming in this old ladies face at McDonald's. I screamed, "ARE YOU AFRAAAAAAAIIIDDD????" and she said, "YES!!!!" and i said, "YOU SHOULDN'T BE!!! YOU'RE ON SCAAAAAARE TACTIIIIIICS!!!!"
I can't tell if meeting them (The Weeze) has ruined my taste for their music or not, BUT my favorite band, Modest Mouse, came on the radio today and as I listened to Isaac Brock squeal I realized that I never wanted to meet him. I bet he's a big, fat, hairy dick and I'd rather just suspect it than actually confirm it.
I've been working on writing a web series over the course of the past few weeks. I don't talk about it. I don't talk about anything when I'm writing...about what I'm writing. I lie in secret and type things, erase them, retype them. I hit a writer's block about a week and a half ago and have been stuck since. Everything I write is forced and stupid and I hate it. I imagine that's how the guy that wrote Inspector Gadget with Matthew Broderic(k?) feels about almost everything he does.
Jade was watching "The Wedding Planner" the other day with Jennifer Lopez and Matthew McConaughy and I was thinking, "if you did something on this film....wrote it, directed it......served lunch on it....would you / could you be at all proud?" There are just certain things that totally escape me. I just could not EVER imagine myself sitting down to write Maid in Manhattan and actually be able to take myself seriously. Maybe it's just me.
I just finished this movie last night called Evil Breed: The Legend of Samhain - I really wanted to post a trailer because it was so frigging good with really bad Irish accents but I couldn't find anything.
Contrary to Jenna Jameson acting in it and the word "breed" being in the title, this is not a porno. It is a legitimate horror film.
In it's place I'll be putting THIS clip from a movie called The Breed (different from Evil Breed - THE Breed is about a pack of mutant dogs that don't look mutant at all that attack a group of teenagers camping on an empty island. EVIL Breed is about a group of "evil imbred forces that pick off young Americans one by one". That's right from the box.)
A SCENE FROM THE BREED:
That was gold and you probably agree.
Sometimes when I'm driving around, I'll have my music at a pretty standard level, but then, when I approach some people on the sidewalk or if I'm driving through a crowd, I turn it up really loud - louder than is standard - just so people can hear my really loud screaming music and think that I'm really cool. Once I get away from them I turn it down because it hurts my ears.
She-Devil and I went out to sushi the other night with some friends. It was pretty cool. One of my buddies has recently developed Bell's Palsy....something like that - it makes half of his face go on strike. I told him I really liked it because it gave him a sort of John Wayne drawl - and it really did and I really meant it. It's supposed to go away in a few weeks with some pills that he's taking so I suggest he go out and just be the biggest badass pirate type he can be for the next half a month because after that - back to normal. BOOOOOOOO-RIIIIIIING.
I almost choked on a piece of sushi. It was too big and I put it all in my mouth anyway (second time in my life I've had to say THAT) and I just couldn't chew or move it around because it filled my cheeks and pinned down my tongue and it was blocking my throat. Then people started to laugh. Then I started to laugh. Then snot blew out my nose. Then Radu (that's his magician name) was like, "Don't make him laugh!" I was going to die or at least pass out and I was certain the only one who was able to do anything about it would be The Pirate and he was all the way across the table and I was pinned against the wall in between The Magician and the She-Devil.
Wipe snot away.
Wipe mouth with snot-free part of napkin.
Force tongue to snap sushi in two.
Chew.
Tell someone else (pirate?) to eat second HUGE sushi. He does and completes it with more grace than I will ever have, even with only half the functionality of his mouth. I was impressed to say the least.
I haven't left my house in days.
....punched in "recluse" into google image search for a visual and this came back:
...it's a brown recluse bite. I suppose it's just as good as anything else I'd turn up...
When I was a kid i used to listen to my mom talk to the dogs and thought she was crazy. Now I talk to my dogs and wonder what's happened. Am I crazy or is talking to animals just part of growing up? Most of the people I know talk to animals, including Harry Potter, who talks to snakes.
Somehow, the Boner that put the above diddy together managed to put all the time and effort into the AMAZING special effects and then dropped the ball on placing the apostrophe in the proper place.
Also, Harry Potter makes me very angry because he can do magic like my magician friend Radu and I can't.
I jumped on here since i hadn't blogged in a while thinking something would come to me if I just started writing.
Sort of feel like I've wasted our time.
I'm going to go look at Rivers' burrito.
No comments:
Post a Comment